I'm only 16 this year and I'm already a mother .. Well, to make the short story long, it all have to start from the day I .......... What are you thinking? I'm talking about my baby cat, Connie.

  Few months ago she was pregnant. I know who's the one that makes her pregnant. *I'M GONNA KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T RESPONSIBLE !!* Few months later, we observed that her tummy is getting bigger. Well, of course the first thought of me and my family is 'Oh my! We gonna have baby kittens' and my mum wasn't happy about it because she have to spend money on kittens instead of her stuff.

  Yesterday night, Connie went outside and never came home for a night. We thought that maybe she wanna find a place to give birth. I'm super duper concerned about her :( I even prayed that God will protect ..

  My mum said they found her today under the Christmas tree. When I came back home, I saw Connie's eyes were open wide like this O.O .. And I saw her butt had something black and I was super nervous so I come down from my car and straight away open the cage to let her come out. She went under the Christmas tree again and laid down. We thought she's gonna give birth today.

  When I was watch 'Slumdog Millionaire' , my mum shouted from the ground floor, said, 'Michelle! We have to get Connie to the vet. I think she can't stand the pain anymore and she's gonna give birth very soon!' Wow.. My mum was so nervous and she makes me nervous too. So we when to the vet, the person said the block thingy is the hands of a kitten. I'm like *WHATA FLUFF??* From that moment onwards, I'm super worry for Connie.

  Then we brought her to the animal clinic and she had a quick scan. The doctor said the one that it's hands come out had dead. My heart was in pain that moment :(

  This is a life-time-experience. I watched the doctor operates Connie's tummy. I'm like WOW she was like Wow and I was like wow .. Haha I'm just try fooling around. Okay, back to the story. The first one that the doctor get out was the weakest one. But the great news is SHE'S ALIVE!! #PraiseGod. Then the second one, is the one who stuck, it's dead

Three saved kittens ♥

The unlucky one

Connie's Operation

Brown and Middle black : Healthy boys

The front one: Weakest, three legs only

  The doctor said I have to prepare my heart because the weakest one may not last long. My heart was in pain

  I still praise God that both the boys are healthy and active. Both lives was saved ♥

PEACE OUT :D ♥

#BreakingJericho

  Last Saturday ( 7.1.2012 ) was the Breaking Jericho! IT IS TOTALLY A.W.E.S.O.M.E. ! 

  

  First in my cell group, I was late because my grandpa's car was broke so I have to wait my mum to go to shop so my dad can come back and fetch me to kyrugma. I reached kyrugma at 5:10pm I was half and 10 minutes late for cell group. When I went in, they're playing 'Blinking Mafia'. They're so high! :D Then Esther lead worship and I played the guitar (Oh yea, I start playing guitar in cell when we multiply cell group. Now I'm in E3 as in Cheryl's cell group). The feel is good! Then PRAISE REPORT! They're also very excited for it. Then Cheryl shared the words. Then it's my turn to lead the Question part. Did I mention I didn't prepare? I DIDN'T! It was a mess but luckily Cheryl cover me. Then after we dismissed we pray for Cheryl as she's the MC of the night. It was her first time. 

  Then prayer meeting. I can tell you before the celebration start the atmosphere was already built up in prayer meeting! The atmosphere was so strong of God's present! Then Cheryl started to MC then worship. Cheryl is really a good MC :) She did great in her first time! Calvin, Sandra and Jeson were the speaker of the night. It was okay I guess. There's one thing we march around the kyrugma seven times. Then we go back to worship we all keep on praying, shouting out to God for breaking our Jericho! It was so strong :')

  Then we have a lot of pictures, I can show you some photos :)

Come and Join us in Eklektos Celebration!

PEACE OUT :D

  

Being a Christian is so AWESOME weird ♥

  Jeson lent me a book titled 'WEIRD'. I'm telling ya, I've only read few pages and it already change my thoughts ! How powerful is God's book? :D

  Being a Christian is so weird! The Bible says Love you enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. OMGowsh! Will you love those who always bully you? No right? Will you do good to those who hate you? No right? Will you bless those who curse you every time? No right? Will you even pray for those who mistreat you? Absolutely NO ! It's normal :) We sinners are all normal. This also means that God, ain't normal! He's totally WEIRD! Weird Weirder WEIRDEST ! Normal people usually do something that's normal, like be in a relationship, drink alcohol, go out in the middle of the night, make their parents worry, fail their subjects like nobody cares, etc .. Well, that's normal :) But if you walk in God's path, it ain't the same! If your friends ask you to hang out on Saturday night, you have to say 'Sorry! I have youth celebration on Saturday night' WHAT? Since when you're going to church? Since when you become so holy? Well, normal people do ask normal answer :) Lots of people may face these kinds of questions, I know because I do too! I face these kinds of questions A MILLION TIMES ! Well every time my friend ask me, I try to explain why am I becoming like this. My friends told me 'I'm not comfortable with you becoming like this, you're so WEIRD. I rather wants the old you.' Get it? you're so WEIRD. Do you see that? Weird! I'm weird! And I'm not regret! Not regret at all! Being weird is so much fun! If we're normal, we're nothing special, just like normal people! But if we walk in God's path, we're weird and SPECIAL! Do you get me? :D

  Today at school, wait, not only today, this week, we have to go to band room to practice. There's a boy that older than me only ONE YEAR! He, always bully me. The bully is not take my lunch money or beat me or something. He's bully is always scold me, sometimes smack my face (no pain, dun worry!) and sometimes insult me! But then I read 'WEIRD' I'm no more fight back. Every time I will like fight back, talk back or something, but this time I didn't! My friend said, 'Walao mk.. Why you like this already? Not like you la. Very WEIRD.' SEE! This word 'WEIRD' is in and out from normal's people's mouth! I'm not surprise anymore! Because I've already know the differences! I though we Christian are normal but I was wrong! The normal is the people around us but God and God's people are weird !

  Last time, I think Christian have no freedom at all. Because they have to go to celebration every Saturday and I'm like 'WHAT? Take away my freedom on Saturday night? No way!' But after I involve in the ministry, it's a NO! It's so much fun then wasting money on unless stuff, on thing that will never satisfy each one of us. Why not we use the money on the Lord? Expand His kingdom! Many weird people will be rising up! Many new generations will be rising up! PRAISE THE LORD! Really hope people would surrender their life to God :) Well, this is not the hard part, the question is, what am I going to do about it? And what are you going to do about it? Are you willing? :)

WHAT AN AWESOME NIGHT TONIGHT !

  Today is the Night of Worship (NOW) .. The dress code is Supa Forma ! Everyone is so pretty and handsome, but God is most beautiful of all! :D We worship none stop .. In the middle after Calvin prayed, we sat in cell groups and in circles.. Then Calvin called each cell member out to tab on people's head when Calvin said a statement and it matches to the people .. Seriously I got alot of tabs .. I felt love! At first when Calvin said each statement, in my head I'm like 'No..That's impossible..I didn't do this this this to anyone' But in the moment I'm thinking this, someone tabs my head.. My heart really melted! I cried :') I thank God for these wonderful people! :)) I thank God that I touched people's life, I involve in people's life :)) Thank you,God!

  Then we prayed together strongly! We doesn't cares about the distractions, we doesn't cares about how people wears, we only cares about what God is thinking just now! We are all focusing on God! The best thing about tonight is that we are gathering together, not to wear our best, not to show our best, is the worship one God! Like Calvin said, 'We only worship one God,' God that can heal the blind, God that heal the lame and God that love us so mush that He gave His one and only Son to die on the cross for us-sinners .. What can we do to repay? Nothing can repay :) Therefore! Go make disciple of all nation! Like it said in the Bible! :) 

  Father Lord who sit in Heaven, I really thank you for the wonderful people that have involve in my life :) That let me know You more and more, they draw me closer to You, Lord, I really wanna give you thanks! I pray that Lord You will bless them Lord! Blessed to the people who love you as well Lord! They have been serving for You Lord even some of them may have exams but they still come to You with a faithful heart. Lord, I pray that You will light up the way, to show them the right path to You Lord! Open up their heart Lord, open their eyes as well, to differentiates good teaching and bad teaching! Lord, bless them Lord. All this I ask in Jesus' name, Amen.

  Wonderful people are not from their parents, is from God :)

They are all awesome! 

They are part of my life!

Thank you Lord Jesus!♥

Time Really Flies :)

TIME REALLY FLIES :)

  It has already been a MONTH and I still having my last paper tomorrow .. Tomorrow we're taking Mathematics Paper 1 & 2 :) MY FAVOURITE SUBJECT OF ALL :D Hahaha .. I can't wait till the last minutes of the exam ! I think I'll turn my table and throw it into the sky and I will run away like nobody cares ! xD I'm just joking ._. Well, Easter said, 'After exam I don't know what to do already' I really agree ! We have a lot of things we wanna do until the minute it comes and we don't know what to do ! :O Seriously ! It's true !

  So yeah .. I don't know what I can said already ! Oh ya I found my cable .. It's in my Mercedez car o.o So yeah .. Hahaha that's all hehe .. I will write more about my holidays in here ! Byee :D

Let's pray for this world

  This is such a good experience for me .. Just now I accompany my youngest sister-Annabel Kok, to her school .. The reason why I accompany her is .. 'Long long long and not so long ago, I don't really know what happened but I heard my mum said that Annabel don't wanna go school anymore, then I ask her, "Bell, why you don't wanna go to school?" She said got people in school bully her, have teacher in school scold her.. "WHAT?! WHO DARE TO TOUCH MA SISTER ?!" ' So, that's the background story .. As I accompany her, I can felt that she's going somewhere not save, going somewhere she felt strange .. I'm very worry to see my sister like that :((

  Hmm .. I'm observing the kindergarden's teacher .. To tell the truth, they're really rude to children >< I didn't really act like I care at there, I act like I don't know what happened but in my heart .. 'OH MY ! How dare you treat little children like that? ' Then, when one of a teacher coming out from the door, my sister start afraid and eyes full of tears.. Wow, maybe that's the teacher who scold my little sister .. Hmm she started to be very afraid and she said 'I wanna go home D':' That really melt my heart .. My poor sister :((

  This world is starting to be very cruel and bad .. These picture is the prove :((

  I'm really very disappointed in this world .. If I have the power, I really wanna change the world .. My friends all says 'Stop dreaming MK ! This is impossible' But what I though is NO! Nothing is impossible when I believe in God :) If I search for the Lord, I believe Lord will give me the strength to do what I wanna do :) 

  Do you really wanna see the world to become mean, become cruel ? No right ? I don't wanna have war, I don't wanna see friends with enermy .. No no ! I don't want ! We must pray hard for this world ! Not even this world, other world as well .. Pray for the spaces ! Everything is counted as God's creation .. We must protect God's generations ! 

Com'on guyss !! Let's all pray together !! :))

PEACE OUT ! :) ♥

Here comes the 'BEST'

  There's been almost a month I didn't really blog ! All thanks to my OneMonthMajorExam ! Yeah right .. Today, the second exam just finish ! But the 'BEST' comes the last .. UEC MAJOR EXAM .. I can tell you that this exam is MONTERIC CRAZY ! I'm seriously not joking ! Yeah, but i'm not afraid .. Coz the Lord is with me ! :)) This post is gonna be short coz I dunno what to say already :/ I don't wanna add something happy into something not happy .. It's Physics ! @@ So yeah .. Hahaha Lord is with me ! :D

What's pass, it's past :)

'Sorry parents .. Sorry church .. Sorry friends .. And SO SORRY GOD !

I've disappointed you all' :'(

  Okay .. Why will I say that ? Urgg !! Of course ! Major exams ! You know yesterday is a holiday for PMR-ers to have a rest.. well.. there are three days but my point is .. Yesterday as I'm resting at home by playing The Sims on Facebook ... Oh ya By the way, THE SIMS SOCIAL ROCKS !! Add me as your neighbours please ! xD Okay as I was saying .. Playing The Sims Social on Facebook, Carmen called me and said 'Hey! Do you want the answers for PMR Sejarah' And I said 'Oh okay. Sure' As I'm marking, my mood slowly drop, my faith slowly drops and guess what ? NO DON'T GUESS ! I won't share my results here == But I can tell you that it's not good .. NOT GOOD AT ALL !! :'(

  Then I asked my mum whether I can go to Carmen's house .. The reason I wanna go because 1. To play The Sims 3 on PC !!! xD 2. To brighten up my day? 3. Because I'm boring ==  Okay that wasn't my point too ..

 
  Gosh .. My blog is getting boring-er and boring-er @@ .. I'm kinda speechless person.. I don't know how to start a topic so ya .. DON'T FORCE ME TO DO SOMETHING I'M NOT GOOD AT IT >< Seriously :] .. I am who I am what ? :) That .. wasn't my point too .. OKAY ! This post is getting pointless .. So yeah .. 

  My point is .. What's pass, it's past :) Stephanie told me this 'DON'T LET CIRCUMSTANCES SHAKEN YOUR FAITH!' She called me shout out loud yesterday! It helps :) Really ! Thanks Stephanie ! ♥ Although my results ain't good but .. PMR results can't judge a person .. So if whoever tried their best, I'm sure God can see it :) God will bless you with something you couldn't expected ! So yeah .. Haha

PMR-ers ! Good Luck in the following exams !

JIA YOU! ADD OIL! TAMBAH MINYAK! :D
 

PEACE OUT ! :D ♥

MAJOR EXAMSSSS @.@

 PMR

UEC MOCK

  UEC

  Gowsh ! Three exams coming right up and I don't even scare ! Gowsh ! Is this how should I act ? @@ Obviously not >< Hahaha Okay .. I don't like exam .. Government is just making the world end earlier ! They're wasting the paper and they have to print hundreds, thousands, millions or BILLIONS of paper for ALL PMR-ers .. That super MONSTERIC scary @@ ..

  Oh well .. I didn't really get to interact with my books @@ Seriously .. Camilla keep on say 'Michelle, why are you so steady ?' I'm like 'What what? Oh okay O.o' Okay that's not my point .. My point is .. I DIDN'T STUDY AT ALL ! What am I thinking ? Fun? Holiday? That's too fast >< .. You know a lot of people says 'Appreciates school life.. Trust me :) ' I'm like 'SCHOOL LIFE? It's like living in dungeon SERIOUSLY ! I love to go school not because of studies, is because of my friends :D Get to have fellowship with them, chit-chat with them .. I love sosial-ing with people :) But I'm a lil shy sometimes ><

  You know .. I hate temptations >< A lot of distraction keep on distracting me from my books T.T .. Outing with youths ♥, hang-out with them, having fun with them ♥ That's what I want ! I really love, enjoy being with them .. They're my family :') But URGG !! Major Exams !! I hate you PAPER ! :'(

PEACE OUT ! :D ♥

Crying while Writing ..

  The first time ever ..

I sinned sinfully again .. 

  

The first time ever .. 

I cried while writing my blog ..

  The first time ever .. 

I HATE a person after I became a holy Christian ..

  

  I'm so hurt right now ..

While I'm writing this ..

" What if You're blessings come through rain drops?

What if You're healings come through tears?  "

Just finished talking with Oscar on phone ..

I sinned ..

I scold a fault words ..

Just then I cried ..

If I'm angry,

Satan is happy ..

I can't let him happy that easily ..

But I just can't stand it !!

I'M REALLY VERY ANGRY !!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

I hate myself ..

Who says my life is wonderful ?

Who says my life is awesome ?

NO NO NO !!

You are W-R-O-N-G !! 

Sometimes I asked God .. "Why do You brought me into this SAD WORLD? " Why does He want me to be here ?? I doubt His plans for me .. Whenever I have problems, I really really REALLY hate to face it .. But I'll still face it .. I always told myself, NEVER TURNING BACK, I'M DARE TO FACE EVERYTHING MYSELF and I CAN DO IT MYSELF ! All this MYSELF MYSELF is so selfish .. Where's God ?? Where's your Saviour ?? I'm to overestimated myself .. I though I can do all things myself .. I though I can face everything myself .. I though I though I I I !! All this I is so selfish .. Where's the Lord ?? Where's your Healer ?? All these years, I've been living in a selfish world .. That's why I asked God why did He brought me into this SAD world .. Then I know .. It's not He's fault at all .. It's my fault .. God You've brighten my life, You've heal my brokenness .. How wonderful You're Lord !! Sorry God for all 15 years I've been hurting You, doubting You and rejected You .. Thanks God for bringing many wonderful youth people to make me know what's the reason that I've been brought to this world .. To save and to help .. I'm here to help the ones who need help .. That's why God had sent me here :')